tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14611974065690613292012-02-11T22:53:15.142-08:00An American former missionary kid from Taiwan now navigating my way through adulthood in Minnesota...sumac chronicleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09691879191289170829noreply@blogger.comBlogger231100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1461197406569061329.post-47723512846812429282012-01-21T16:57:00.000-08:002012-01-24T16:08:56.844-08:00

I've been pondering my idea of love lately. We use the word love all the time, but it is not something that I can see in any contained physical form. It's used on so many levels, from the meaning of life, to fondness, and for some reason has always been this all-consuming mystery to me that could somehow crack the code to the meaning of life. My idea of love can be described in the lyrics of "A

sumac chronicleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09691879191289170829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1461197406569061329.post-81018030966504352832011-12-31T07:58:00.000-08:002012-01-22T07:51:56.600-08:00

It's been two years since writing about anything happening in present time. There were many moments where blogs nearly came out, but they were in the middle of suffering moments and were deleted at the last minute. It is much easier to look back and make sense of a difficult period in time than it is to analyze it as it's happening in the present. I hated the sound of my posts when reading them

sumac chronicleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09691879191289170829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1461197406569061329.post-32900983147523095682011-12-24T22:06:00.000-08:002012-01-22T07:51:19.956-08:00

Remember the glimpse of past promenades I manned a manger of soft quilted plaidsmy mother read from the Holy Bookmy brothers stood by holding staffs with hooksI cradled and cooed Mr. plastic baby Jand wondered what I'd get from my parents next day My father took pictures, young faces so sweetthis famous scene we'd forever repeatEach Christmas again with crock pots and cookieswe'd tell the same

sumac chronicleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09691879191289170829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1461197406569061329.post-65753320694957153952011-03-05T08:10:00.000-08:002011-03-05T10:59:09.595-08:00

"C'mon, gang! Let's get a move on!" my dad often said in an excited tone as we'd all pile into the van. Our family of five (and later, six) required a larger vehicle--especially when it came to road trips. It wasn't that the three of us kids couldn't fit into a sedan, but the mission owned the vehicles, which often involved transporting larger groups of people than just our family unit, so the

sumac chronicleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09691879191289170829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1461197406569061329.post-64499253789496302742010-05-15T20:09:00.001-07:002011-12-31T12:16:16.068-08:00

We started our evening at Mary's Hamburgers, our favorite childhood family restaurant, where the jumbo cheeseburger and fries were heaven, where we'd put vinegar on our fries, and there'd always be a table in the back with a few red-faced men with 20+ Taiwan beers empty on the table, where I always got Diet Coke cuz that's what the adults got, where I saw a grown woman with a polio vaccination

sumac chronicleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09691879191289170829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1461197406569061329.post-82752418445086515952010-03-18T17:36:00.000-07:002011-01-08T08:43:57.542-08:00

We saved up enough money to visit my oldest brother Jon, his wife Andrea, their 10 month old boy Samuel, and Jack Russel terrier Jenny, who just moved to Sofia, Bulgaria four months ago. We had the privilege of spending all of our spring break with them. It was our first trip to Europe together.Here are some notes I put down in my iPod along the way:Everyone clapped when the plane landed in Sofia

sumac chronicleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09691879191289170829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1461197406569061329.post-3289091690252306422010-01-09T10:44:00.001-08:002011-01-08T08:42:06.443-08:00

I received 2 sessions of therapy today that were monumental. Neither occurred in an office while lying on a couch, although, I am beginning to like the sound of that scenario...paying to reach self-guided conclusions with the help of a professional. It's like what everyone who talks to God needs: a professional to filter out the bullshit before you decide what you interpret as "God's voice", only

sumac chronicleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09691879191289170829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1461197406569061329.post-48392037634718198192009-12-16T19:15:00.000-08:002011-01-08T08:39:36.309-08:00

I had originally titled this entry "semester from hell", but since I survived with good grades and a good job still intact, something must have gone right along the way. It was the most stressful few months I have ever really felt without allowing myself some kind of backdoor getaway to excuse myself from the situation. I've had a lot of nightmares at night and vertigo, headaches, and ringing

sumac chronicleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09691879191289170829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1461197406569061329.post-38752287880497432162009-10-29T14:58:00.000-07:002011-01-08T08:37:40.330-08:00

It's Halloween today, and a light snow is blowing straight to the left off the bow of our apartment ship. Poor little kids are gonna be cold tonight, but I'm sure the candy's worth it. I turned 30 on wednesday, and consider that a huge milestone--long-term planning was never my forte; I always figured I'd somehow die before I got to this (st)age. However, that figure has gone now, and death seems

sumac chronicleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09691879191289170829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1461197406569061329.post-2164005130880307902009-10-01T18:01:00.000-07:002011-01-08T08:48:55.305-08:00

I broke my toe three weeks ago--with three weeks to go until the 50 miler. The doctor said it takes about six weeks for a toe to fully heal. He looked at me like I was crazy when I asked if I could still run on it. It would be really risky to run that far on a broken toe. I sobbed in the doctor's office, in the x-ray lab, and all the way home.As mentioned in my last blog, I've been a bit

sumac chronicleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09691879191289170829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1461197406569061329.post-65406319612684797932009-08-19T16:08:00.000-07:002011-01-08T08:32:12.187-08:00

My books are lying on the floor to the left of me, along with a $130 TI-84 Plus scientific calculator that hasn't been taken out of its package yet (perhaps because of the sticker that cries, "No return if unwrapped!"). Engineering Your Future, Wildfire 4.0 Tutorial, and Algebra with Trigonometry are the titles of the books I am about to consume in the next 4 months. School starts next week.

sumac chronicleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09691879191289170829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1461197406569061329.post-34033553979563394642009-07-28T15:31:00.000-07:002011-01-08T08:25:32.685-08:00

Upon arriving back in St Paul after Grandma's Marathon, we immediately found ourselves on marathonguide.com, looking for the next race. I spotted the Half-Voyageur Trail Marathon, two weeks away, back up in Duluth, and signed my legs up for another 26.2.On Saturday morning, the 12th of July, my husband and I woke up at 2:30am, and made the drive up to Duluth. I sipped on coffee and chattered the

sumac chronicleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09691879191289170829noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1461197406569061329.post-39680595197772496832009-07-09T14:59:00.000-07:002011-01-08T08:46:42.883-08:00

We all sat in a dimly lit room partitioned off from the rest of the diners at the Lake Elmo Inn and ate our meals at tables organized by age group. There was one giant round table in the middle where my grandparents sat with their three daughters (my mom and my two aunts) and their husbands. Four satellite booths surrounded them--one consisting of the married grandkids with young children (the

sumac chronicleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09691879191289170829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1461197406569061329.post-45891809998189272392009-06-27T08:26:00.000-07:002011-01-08T08:49:38.849-08:00

It's the day before our first marathon--June 19, 2009. I just finished my algebra homework. Every few questions, I had to go into the other room and unplug and re-plug in the modem so I could get a fresh but fleeting connection. In about an hour, my oldest brother and his family will pick me up and we will begin the big weekend.This weekend has arrived like two plates colliding insdide the earth,

sumac chronicleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09691879191289170829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1461197406569061329.post-39123089592711540932009-06-18T15:03:00.000-07:002011-01-08T08:14:22.376-08:00

"Mother's Story of Her Memories." (This was passed from my Grandma's Mother to my Grandma, who just gave it to my mom. This letter is 4 generations before me.)I have been asked to do this by some of my children. First I think I shall try to recall what I have been told about my grandparents grandparents. My father was born in Skaane, Sweden. I think the name of the town was Garo, near

sumac chronicleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09691879191289170829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1461197406569061329.post-15931791207472839152009-05-31T08:02:00.000-07:002011-01-08T08:11:05.981-08:00

Considering the fact that I was much shorter in the first ten years of my life than I am now, and liked to lay, spin, handstand, and run on the surface we gravitate toward most, when I think of the past, I think a lot of floors. I'm sure if we all think back to those days, many of us could give specific details on those friendly surfaces. Because Taiwan was a tropical climate, and we lived in a

sumac chronicleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09691879191289170829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1461197406569061329.post-45266230743685171992009-05-22T12:13:00.000-07:002011-01-08T08:17:26.640-08:00

My memory has been floating back to my very early years in Taiwan in the house where I spent most of my formative years, and where I have my earliest conscious memories. I have been avoiding writing about this physical place because it contains so much, but today I am fluish and bed bound and "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" came on MPR just as I deciding to put down the computer and nap. I took it

sumac chronicleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09691879191289170829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1461197406569061329.post-42016594305132021322009-05-13T13:45:00.000-07:002011-01-08T08:18:35.914-08:00

In deciding to consciously record my steps to a better me, I have run into familiar spaces that have tripped me up in the past. One that comes up continuously is my vision of what I want to be as opposed where I am right now. There is me. And then there are lines coming out of me that end in bubbles of where I want to be: an ultramarathoner, an electrical engineer, a world-traveler, an amazing

sumac chronicleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09691879191289170829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1461197406569061329.post-65693882867751449412009-05-05T15:56:00.000-07:002011-01-08T08:01:52.272-08:00

About two years ago, a very close relative asked me what changed my thinking to help me go from self-abuse (drug-abuse) to self-love. I wrote her back this very long email. I share it not for attention or approval but as a record of what I went through and how my thinking has changed. This particular recovery experience is almost six years old now, and this response is about a year old:Well, it's

sumac chronicleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09691879191289170829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1461197406569061329.post-43391338802269638292009-05-03T10:18:00.000-07:002011-01-08T08:22:24.628-08:00

I remember talking to my socks in my sock drawer when they hadn't been worn for a while. "Your turn will come. Sorry I skipped over you."A teeny-tiny miniature family lived inside a crack in my wall, and I talked to them. I'd lean up against the crack with a flashlight shining in it, and I could see them all eating dinner around the kitchen table.On bus rides to school, a perfect world existed in

sumac chronicleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09691879191289170829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1461197406569061329.post-10427261634968982752009-04-26T14:44:00.001-07:002011-01-08T07:55:11.263-08:00

Last Friday and Saturday, I spent five hours getting a sumac tree carved into my right arm. It's a tattoo that was inspired last fall by a grove of trees we camped beneath in the summer. The trunks were tall and slender and slowly undulated their way toward the sky, stopping at around 10 feet and then spreading their green leaves like a canopy of cool shade. Bright red fruits crowned to tops of

sumac chronicleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09691879191289170829noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1461197406569061329.post-19828236636537033882009-04-26T14:41:00.000-07:002011-01-08T07:52:02.317-08:00

I had a dream when I was about eight years old that I found a magic quilt, and the quilt would do anything I wanted. At first I stuck my hand under it to test it. I wished my hand would be purple with green spots when I pulled it out. It was. So then I crawled completely under the blanket and asked the blanket to show me what I would look like when I was 22. To my dismay, I saw myself, overweight

sumac chronicleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09691879191289170829noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1461197406569061329.post-78379152193895647032009-04-05T16:21:00.000-07:002011-01-08T07:49:43.009-08:00

It’s raining in St. Paul in February. I only worked half a day today. Business is slow at the factory, and every so often someone gets to go home early in order to keep labor dollars down. So at 10:30am, which is normally the start of a 20 minute lunch break, I got to punch out and leave. It will probably be a few more months before I get another rare opportunity to stare out our living room

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